“Inner peace has a lot to do with kindness to others and gentleness to yourself.” – Maxime Lagacéo –
Have you ever noticed that when you are kind and loving to the people in your life, you are happier? As I have studied happiness, I have been reminded that how we treat others has great returns for ourselves.
This month I am doing a virtual Meetup called “Thirty Days of Kindness”. It takes place on Saturdays: April 3, 11, 18, and 25, 2026, from 10v to 11:30 AM Pacific Time on Zoom. If you miss the first week, go to my Meetup event page and RSVP so you can receive the email reminders and be part of the experience. Thirty Day Kindness Challenge
I am basing this event on the book, The Kindness Challenge: Thirty Days to Improve Any relationship by Shaunti Feldhahn (2016.) The book, and much more, can be found here: Join the Kindness Challenge
Feldhahn’s concepts are simple, yet profound. She counsels us to:
- Say nothing to or about the other person,
- Offer praise
- Perform acts of kindness for them. Numerous people have written about kindness. In his book Love as a way of life: Seven keys to transforming every aspect of your life, Gary Chapman puts kindness at the top of the list of characteristics of love that enhance relationships. Love as a Way of Life
Can you recall a time when someone said a kind word or did something kind for you? How did that make you feel? If you have ever performed an act of kindness for someone, how did that make you feel? If you answered “cared about” or lighter hearted, just imagine how much richer your relationships will be if you adopt kindness as a way of life.
Since my son passed away, my daughter-in-law has refused to allow me to communicate with or see my granddaughters. I am deeply saddened. Sometimes it’s hard to feel hopeful that they will reach out to me when they are older. I took a course called “Recognizing the Signs,” from Intuitive, Patty Lennon.
I posted a comment on one of her You Tube entries about my feelings. I said, “what if they never reach out?” Patty’s reply was, “what if they do?” And then she said, “oh, Darian, be gentle with yourself.” Those kind words made me cry. That caring, from a stranger, reminded me that being kind to myself is also important. At the end of the day, being kind and gentle with ourselves is how we are going to bounce back from life’s hurts and disappointments.
Author, Jennifer Bonn, also writes about this in her blog, “Treat Yourself with Kindness: Ten Ways to Turn Self-Negativity Around. She encourages us to turn our negative, intrusive thoughts around. Here are three of her tips that I find most helpful:
- Make a mantra. Have a positive sentence about yourself that you can repeat until you believe it. An example is strong, smart, and kind.
- Take time every day to shut off the noise. Heal, take a break, and find the quiet.
- Realize someone else might need to see a good role model, so spread positivity being who you are.
Finally, another way to be kind and gentle with yourself is “The Most Loving Thing” exercise, brought to us by Marci Shimoff. Write this question on a post it: “What’s the most loving thing I can do for myself right now?” Whether it is taking a sip of water, going for a walk, or calling a friend, make a commitment to doing that thing to take care of yourself.
Want to have more harmonious relationships? Come to my Meetup and learn more about these tips. Try a little kindness; it’s a beautiful healer.